where did the silence go?
everything is a bit fast and noisy for me in here, you know
drowned by fear and regrets
time’s fleeting away
and I’m getting old
I can’t think anymore
or feel,
or love,
or hate,
I can’t change any more.
all is shallow, and
I only see a reflection of yesterdays
and tomorrow,
ah there’s no tomorrow
but a dark cloud hanging above my head
I want to cry once again
I want to laugh
make me angry!!
punch me or kiss me,
I don’t care
I just want to be alive
Where did the dreams fall?
Now I am alone
watching Netflix on my bed all-day
nothing meaningful to do
nothing to care
no purpose
I miss the feeling of being indestructible,
to be a stranger in a foreign land
when I was alone in the wild
when I was unstoppable
when my eyes were eager for the world
and my feet were strong enough to carry the wounds of the damned
now, I am not the kid who wants to explore the world anymore
nor to face the dangers of the unknown
nor to climb the mountain’s peak
or to fall in love thousands of times
I am a grumpy little old man nowadays
and I wonder, how did I end up here.
mks, 8/12/22
